Two Different Worlds

Those title words came easy.  Initially I thought about the specifics of the world of people I live in versus the world of people I feel at home with.  As a partial example, I feel more at home with poor and homeless people than I do with other groups.  It could just be a perception but it is mine.

Actually the initial thought had to do with a specific person based upon the perceived lifestyle they have, a lifestyle I do not want to live.

Then it changed into all sorts of differences with specific people and their own worlds.  I believe I have explored this idea before but maybe from another perspective.  I did not look it up because “reasons”.

I feel more at home.  That is an interesting thought pattern.  Feeling at home is not something I really do.  That mysterious place is allusive.  Just out of reach.

I rebel against everything and nothing at all.  I read an interesting article about people who enjoy being alone.  One of the points was they are full of contradictions, a human oxymoron.  That was a very good word selection.  It is what we feel like.  Wanting to be both alone and with others.  Trapped in a desire for two different worlds.

Acceptance for the person you are seems rare.  Expectations for the person “they” want you to be seems to be the norm.  Placing your idea of what I should be.

I watched a good TED talk two days ago.

Asked the kids a lot of questions yesterday morning and then had them watch it after work while dinner was cooking.  Of course this was followed by more questions.  The big one in my mind was “What do you want to be?”.  Then I clarified – not what you want to do for a living but what do you want to be.

My three adopted daughters came over last night for a visit.  So I got to have a second dinner with them and have the same conversation.  It, of course, was different given two of them are younger than my kids.  Aubree said “oh like if you want to be happy”.  That girl is very smart and I pray she gets the direction she needs to use it.

I got a hug from Abbee (I asked).  I told her that just brightened my day right up.  She put on Kristen’s glasses later as she was dressing up.  What a cutie.

Today we begin anew.  Almost like every other day?  Exactly like every other day.  Here we go…